I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
