I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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