That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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