When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
