So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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