we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
