so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
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