If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
You need a sexual gate keeper
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
