Tell her she can't have a vagina
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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