dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Buhtt sex?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize