I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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