I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize