wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
