The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
