god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
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Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
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You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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