I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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