"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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