I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
