how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Randomize
