she was so not down for the gang bang
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
