have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
