Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize