remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
