Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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