So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
