wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Just invented taco cereal.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
