We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
