so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
You took a bar mat shot.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize