You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
