I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
