OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I need to align my fucking chakras
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize