Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
