If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
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