and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
