matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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