turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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