I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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