Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
My ass is underappreciated
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
