I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
