worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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