never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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