Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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