Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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