dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I think my vagina is haunted
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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