i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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