Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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