is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
