I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
This girl is more easily done than said...
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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