Please, let me fuck your mom
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
