I could have mohawked her pubes.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
